There was more than one cause. In an interview, Peter Facinelli discussed how his relationship with his ex-wife Jennie Garth changed over time and how it affected his relationship with Lily Anne Harrison, his fiancée.
On Tuesday, April 12, episode of the podcast “Allison Interviews,” the 48-year-old actor said, “I think in partnerships, in the beginning, they are beautiful.” It’s wonderful that you are in the honeymoon phase.
The Twilight actress, who was married to Garth, now 50, for 11 years before their 2012 divorce, remembered how things “slowly, over time” started to go south.
It’s possible that someone will say something nasty. If the other person agrees, they can develop a habit, according to Facinelli. Therefore, undesirable behaviors such as treating one another poorly or granting the other person permission or latitude to speak to you in a particular manner can develop into habits.
Everyone has bad days, the Unbreakable Boy actor said, but it’s difficult to fully return to the happy times once your partner’s cruel behaviors become more prevalent.
“If that individual speaks to you or behaves in a certain way, they may suddenly feel free to do so because you didn’t express regret for their actions. You remained silent, Facinelli continued. “All of a sudden, it becomes routine, it intensifies, and you start to feel angry.”
The New York native went on to say that it’s difficult to modify those habits once they’ve been formed. She and peter are parents to the daughters Luca, 24, Lola, 19, and Fiona, 15.
“A connection is similar to a tree. If it starts to bend at first, you can straighten it out, but if you let it go down that road, there is nothing you can do to bend it back since it has already developed and consolidated in that direction,” he explained.
Every relationship is unique, according to Facinelli. You’re going to act differently with this [new] person than I would have with my ex-wife.
Ahead of their wedding, the can Hardly Wait actor’s approach to communication with Harrison, 33, was impacted by his relationship with the Beverly Hills, 90210 alum.
“I believe that our first meeting was so amazing that I told Lily, “I truly want to keep onto this. I want us to be incredibly careful with one other, so let’s try really hard each day to avoid developing negative habits, he said. We have been together for six years, and I’m incredibly happy with our relationship because we hardly ever yell at each other.
According to Facinelli, if the couple does disagree, they “talk it through” and make an effort to avoid any form of conflict.
We take great care not to offend anyone or establish that doing so is acceptable. Simply being very careful to treat one another with respect, kindness, and honesty at all costs,” the former Nurse Jackie star continued. As soon as you stop doing it and believe you have permission to stop doing it, disagreements and yelling start to become routine and damage the relationship.
“I would say that is what I learned [from my previous marriage], is to just not get into unhealthy habits,” he said in his conclusion.
Garth, for her part, exclusively disclosed to Us Weekly in April 2018 that while their co-parenting dynamics have improved after their breakup, they have still experienced ups and downs.
The What I Like About You actress reflected at the time, “I learned that forgiveness is possible and time heals wounds, which is hard to believe when you’re in it. But in the end, everything turns out okay.
Garth moved on after her breakup with Facinelli and married Dave Abrams in 2015. In 2017, the couple separated for a while, but they have since reignited their romance.